Two telephones and several opinions.

My grandfather has a girlfriend. Its complicated because 1. They live states apart 2. They are both deteriorating in health and 3. My grandmother is still alive.

My grandmother, Lenora, resides in the more assisted care part of their nursing home, while my grandfather, Bonner, lives in the independent wing.

Effie, my grandfather's girlfriend, use to be a member of of his congregation. Shortly after her husband passed they renewed their friendship via the phone. Then small talk turned to reading books to each other. Reading only a chapter a day turned into reading two or three books a week.

At one point my Grandfather's bill got pretty pricey. No worries my Grandfather would call Effie, "I'm here" and with her free long distance she would call back.

There have been several "episodes" in the last few years where their relationship got so intense that Grandpa would not come to visit my Grandmother due to his time being consumed with Effie. I found this impressive because I could barely have a three hour conversation when I was in middle school. What do two people in their late 80s talk about? Does my former preacher grandfather have phone sex?

Well theses "episodes" usually come to a head and 4 of the 6 kids would confront my Grandfather. He apparently is very defensive, as anyone should be about their kids running their life. Though all every one's thoughts are of my Grandmother, Lenora, with her dark sunglasses and makeup applied every day, sitting there alone in her room.

My mom called tonight. This is the first Effie episode in awhile. The eldest son found letters that Effie wrote Bonner, and was disgusted by their nature. I'm not sure what they were as he is a pretty conservative man. Though once again what do two 80 year olds that talk all day have to write about each other... sex, thats all I can think off. I know its bad but I think about play on words like Bonner and boner.

During his visit my Uncle was also annoyed the time they spent with Grandma in her room, Grandpa just continually looked at his watch. My uncoordinated Grandpa also had two falls this week, from rushing to answer the phone. When she can't get him on his phone she calls the nurse's station.

Do you forsake the wife of your six kids and wife of 60+ years for someone you truly love? Can we make this call for our parents? Has anyone ever loved my Grandmother that much, to fall over to answer the phone? What does my quiet Grandmother sit and dream about all day? Can we follow our hearts at any age?